Leaders at Home
It is easy to lose focus of our true priorities in this hectic and fast-paced world that we live in. I recently read this quote that has stayed with me…
“Hey leaders: Your most significant vision casting will take place at home while putting your kids to bed.” – Andy Stanley
I was first introduced to Andy Stanley in grad school when we read “Visioneering.” I had not expected the first book in the course of study for my MBA to be written by the leader of a mega-church. Andy Stanley’s text was about his process of developing a vision, plan or goal and then successfully selling that vision to others – vision casting.
“Visioneering” along with several of his others books sit on the shelf in my office where I can easily reach them. Intertwined throughout his books is the constant reminder that leaders begin at home. Many leaders throughout history have sacrificed their family for the sake of their vision. It doesn’t have to be that way.
Last night I was writing an update for our church Facebook page, encouraging members to pray for the tornado victims in Oklahoma. I wanted to make sure to include the victims in our area from the storms of the previous week. Then I realized that the current events might distract us from the tragedy in West, TX so I mentioned that as well. That brief space didn’t allow room for all the personal tragedies such as the Dallas firefighter who died this week while trying to save others. All these tragedies can make us question God and the world we live in or they can fix in our minds the need to craft within our children the plan that God has for them and for our family.
A video grab of bedtime with our oldest daughter when she was two. (Click here for video.)
There are nights when we put our children to bed that help me to clearly realize my importance as a parent. In our house we sing a song, pray and then let our older daughter ask two questions. Quite often she wants to know what we are planning to do the next day, or several days in the future. But other times she will drop a big question in just a few words…wanting to know how things are made or why people do certain things. The gears are turning in her young mind and we sit down to give her an answer, perhaps the most important answer we have given her all day.
Last night was not one of those ideal nights at bedtime. Our older daughter had to go to bed early as the consequence for continual misbehavior during the evening. To put it mildly, she was not happy about her consequence. But last night was a big part of showing our daughter the vision her mother and I have for our family and for her life. We expect a certain type of behavior in our children just as God does His. When we don’t behave as we should there are consequences.
Quite often at bedtime our children are exhausted and the parents are too. We just want them to get in bed and stay in bed so we can have a few moments of peace. Many times in life, the most powerful moments we have come when we are completely exhausted and drained. Great leaders push through to do what must be done, what only they can do. Parents have a role to fulfill and it is one that only they can do. When you’re pushed to the end of your rope, and you will be, try to remember the vision you have for your family. Leaders begin at home!
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I have three other quick things I want to share with you that are separate from the thought for today….
1) This has been on my heart and mind. How are you using social media? I was disturbed last night when I saw some people I know who are Christ followers who posted up (or commented/liked) a political joke that involved the tornadoes in Oklahoma. I was glad to see the post was later taken down but it haunts me that worldly interests would allow us to lose sight and make light of the tragedy of death, suffering and loss of so many. Social media can be a powerful tool, and just like any powerful tool it must be used with some caution and care.
2) I started a new giveaway yesterday. I have three copies of Jon Acuff’s new book “Start” that I will be giving away next Tuesday. Check out yesterday’s post to enter to win a copy. It’s super easy.
3) Tuesdays are the day I post my family worship guide. I have been very pleased to hear from a number of people who are enjoying the study throughout the year. I’ll be honest, the number is not as high as I had hoped for but it is still good. Each week the study gets downloaded about 100 times and some of those 100 downloads are for distribution at churches. I appreciate everyone who is sitting down with their family and taking some time to study the Bible. This week we have part 2 in the short series about Ruth and Naomi. Week 21 – Ruth & Naomi – Part 2
As to the “quick things” #1. I have no idea what this “joke” was about and am not trying to condone it, especially since I only know what you wrote. That said, I DO know that many MANY people cope with tragedy and death with “humor”. Not always acceptable, often very BLACK, but it helps them cope. Since you mentioned it was a “political joke” I would guess that coping was not their intent, but the rest of the above does often hold true. Cope in whatever way works or go crazy. Some might throw themselves into their work, some retreat in some way, some cry, some laugh. Again, I suspect what you mentioned did not fall into this.
Now to the CORE of your post: I like the idea of letting them ask 2 questions @ bedtime. I’d never heard that idea. I used to put our kids down and Michael was lulled to sleep with reading a story and then singing to him. Catie, on the other hand, would usually let me finish reading the story (not always) and then I would sing to her. Many MANY MANY times though, somewhere through whatever part I was doing @ the time she would tell me I could leave, she was ready to go to sleep; and she WAS. She seemed to reach a point where she determined it was time to sleep and I was no longer needed to try to get her to go to sleep. For her this routine was by far more regular than singing her to sleep. Every
kid is different.